​I took Jesus as my Savior

And He gave to me a song;
With love He drew me to him—
A love so pure and strong.
His love was never failing—
On me did not depend;
Tho' I am most unworthy
His life did freely spend.



Man was not so loving
And conditions on me laid;
The way that Jesus led me
Caused man to be dismayed.
Since man was ever present
God's love began to dim;
As man loomed ever larger
My eyes were turned from Him.



E'er long my eyes were blinded
God's love had turned to hate;
Tho' I knew He was unchanging,
Man's pride had changed my state.
My song of joy became a dirge—
God's love an elusive dream.
Jesus was so close at times,
But at God I longed to scream.



My view of God was so distorted
I had to turn Him off;
Sundays were a 'turn down' day—
At preachers I did scoff.
My personal life was so fulfilling
When I avoided the 'spiritual life';
Whene'er the twain did meet,
I knew nothing else but strife.



The two lives that I lived
Were mutually exclusive;
Personal life was so fulfilled
But peace in spiritual life elusive.
The recourse that I chose
Was to be two different persons;
But when the two begin to mix
The situation always worsens.



I had tried my best to cope
With a distorted view of God;
In doing so I created a monster
That me, at will, did prod.

I cannot be the 'personal me'

Nor can I cope with the 'freak';
My great desire is to be free,
But I am becoming increasingly weak.



I know Jesus as my Savior
And have yielded all to Him;
Yet, to let Him be my life
Is like sitting on the canyon rim.
I can neither reject Him completely
Nor 'let go and let God' be the wedge,
To open the floodgates of Heaven
So I teeter on the edge.



Years in bondage have taken their toll—
I am not free to be me;
It's not enough to have freedom;
I must also have liberty.
The Word says I can rest and abide
And do so with consummate ease
When I can let Jesus be life
I'll be free as a summer breeze.



Until I can claim my liberty
I'm still in bondage tho’ free;
My mind can grasp the truth,
But emotions won't let me be me.
Soon I'll not divide others
Between the 'spiritual freak' and me;
As the two in Him become one,
At last I'll know liberty!